Hey guyz. I just wanna post this.. It's already been quite some time already. Im fine already. Ok. Here I go. 1 and a half month ago, God discipled me. I think so. Coz it seem to struck me deeply. Ok. Here I am, announcing that I lost my passion for God which is few months back. I dont know why too. I lost my faith, I looked down on myself, I compared myself with others, I stopped dreaming dreams, I stopped thinking about God, loving God and even fear Him in my life. And plus, alot of things happened along the way. But somehow I never want to leave God. Argh.. I dont know how to explain it from here about the never wanting to leave God. I know God did alot of things in my life that I think I never forget about. I know I hurted God alot for the passed few months which the period of losing my passion for Him. Me of not wanting to spend time with Him etc.. And I tried alot of ways to get to back to God, but it seem like Im still dry and cant get connect to Him. Soon after, I started to hate trying to get connection with God. I tried reading my bible, nothing to speak to me. Ha. Now I know the answer, coz I come to God without an open heart. And one day, which is abt 1 and a half month ago, I cried out to God and told Him that, "GOD, I CANT LIVED MY LIFE LIKE THAT ANYMORE! IM LIKE ROTTING AWAY! IS HURTING, I CANT LIVED WITHOUT YOU! I WANT TO STOP HURTING YOU!" And that was my prayer to Him. 2 days later, I went into bed and in the middle of the night, suddenly someone slapped me in my face. I felt the pain and it went numb and soon after it doesnt hurt anymore. Is like 3-5 seconds pain. No cake, right?? ha. Kidding. Back to my story... I couldnt sleep for awhile and soon I fell asleep. And not long after I heard a loud voice shouted these into my ears. "YOU BETTER CHANGE YOUR LIFESTYLE!!" And I was like woah... okok! I will, I will.. And the next day, I started to read bible and pray to God with my heart, but I guess I was still not open enough. And I felt nothing after doing so much. But I never give up. I continued to pray and pray, read and read my bible... And soon enough, I started to find there's sparkles of fire is starting to light up. I treasured this new fresh of my fire for God and I went on with positive heart. And which where I am now.. Last sunday, when I was on my way to church, God flashed some pictures of the things that He done for me in past in my mind. And I teared, and I told God that, "Lord, I really wanna thank You for everything that You done for me and causes me not to never forget it. And most of all, You never forsake me when I lost my passion. I love You, Lord. Amen." And after that, I put a smile on my face and closed my eyes to think about God. Now I feel more like a happier person with God again.. =)