Woke up many times today. I couldnt rest well; I just had a lot of things running through my mind. A day of lousiness. I didnt know what to do. So I had porridge for lunch and rest awhile and went on to Toa Payoh Stadium to jog. I didn't jog much. I jogged 4 rounds and it took me 12 mins 10 secs. Aiyo. 1 round = 3 mins 2.5 secs. I remembered when I was pri 6, it took me 8 mins 32 secs to finish 4 rounds. Damn lousy now loh. -.-" Dulan lah! After that, I felt even more lousy. Dots. Supposedly to feel better after exercise but I made it worse. Sigh. I went home and took my bathe. I dried my hair and start staring at my ceiling, questioning myself about my life. I let things run through my mind, put on some songs and blast my ears. Do some work on my bed and hug my bloster all day long and smell it. Toss and turn on my bed. Turn on the televison and watch Ellen Degeneres Show.

And now Im here, blogging. Try to understand me. Life is not easy, not as simple as ABC. I been thru what I need to and now Im here cos of the choice that I made. I just wanna say something... I love my 2 cousins- Norman & Celeste. I hope their lives can be easy too. I may not understand them completely but there are something that I wish I could do for them. Im glad that Im still breathing, Im glad that I still get to see them to grow up and that is the coolest part of my life. They have their friends to be with. They have their own parents to deal with. I just want them to know that I love them very much. =) Joann jie-jie love Norman & Celeste cousin very much. =)

Right now my mind is loaded by losing faith, hope and love. Losing faith in my work, losing hope for family and losing love for everyone. Yeah. Probably a season of me on my weakness. I hope that things will soon be over. I need to go somewhere where I can shout out loud!!! I need a place that is peaceful to stay on!! I need a warm & sweet coffee to chill me down!! I need these and that!! A lot of things in my mind. Im running away from myself. Im too tired to deal with myself.